The walk on road today, unintentionally accompanied me with thoughts to either choose a joyous life, which I needed to create or just give up my self in hands of destiny, which is not my nature, certainly.
I was walking slowly on the road and the chilling breeze was on its own way, as it wanted to disturb me from the state of being lost in my own thoughts but my conscience was not ready for it. My heart was filled with emotions, minor for myself and majorly for others ( parents, friends, spouse and family) , how does it matter that these emotions were completely not mine, the reaction was completely on my physical body i.e. my own heart, a feeling of little pain.
I was analyzing about the future, about the way I love myself or Do I really know my worth, can’t deny that I was judgmental about my own being, my history and from the roots I belong to and to the roots I had chosen to grow in future. Future, yes, it is the window, which was constantly being knocked by worries. Suddenly, I remembered a quote of Buddha : Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
But, intensity of limitations like how and my own fears was blocking it to swallow meaning of the quote, easily like butter. In midst of all judgements, worries and fears, I know the light holded me and I holded it tightly too, to show me the way, to let go, to guide me for my actions. I knew I wanted to allow myself to let this light create a life for me, which is my own path blessed with abundance. This spark of light assured me to live a life, which probably would be little different to even manifest, as this is not the time to follow those beliefs, which I and a part of my genes and society had done for ages.
Another belief that blocked me for a while was to would it be wise and justified to believe and decide to live the way, which my genes could not dare and had chosen a life in which they lost identity of their potential and uniqueness. But then I remembered one more quote posted at Vianna mam’s facebook wall : Life is a gift to us and what we do with our life is our gift to God. And, mere a second of this thought washed my all doubts completely with God’s light and gave me an acceptance to love and honor myself more than ever before. Everything in life has a purpose, has something to tell us, has something to teach us, but I choose God’s way to learn way now. This walk on the road was slowly ending towards solutions of recalling and attaining my unlimited potential, my purity of intent of being together without giving myself any kind of trouble. My entire faith to my own source was not subject to being questioned any more now, my divine odyssey of blessed future started now, my walk with loneliness ended right away with my last step towards beginning of acceptance and celebration for my own self worth with my loved ones.
There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.
Buddha
Easy to Recreate life 