Life changing – incidents was occurring one after another in 2012 and one major one happened on 25th October 2012. I was happy in my own world and a list of dreams – good or bad ; it became a major war within later. I got a call from one of the renowned healer therapist in Delhi and she asked me to meet immediately. I was surprised, amused and much more by getting a call from her but then met her in defence colony, New delhi. There was no agenda of the meeting and then she shared some dark secrets of the industry and the people , which helped me to save my life and much more.
This is how it all started…..
This simple meeting yet heavy, my journey with law of truth started on this earth. After few months i got marries and in one line I was doomed. The therapist became a very good friend of mine to the level of being there by myside all the times. Till i die, I will have this gratitude for the therapist for making me a better human being, for helping to taste good foods, wearing nice clothes etc and above all ; learnt art of truly giving.
But life was determined to give me a new shape from many angels and reformed me into what – that I am still making out. During those days I was committed head to toe to spread awareness of God’s vibes to people and I wanted a platform for my grooming; to make this dream live. The friend gave me this opportunity.
At one hand, all was going good – I was becoming better but yes I started feeling sadness in 2013 itself. After so many years, I know clearly why ? because my friend was depressed and wanted to explore happiness part of the life – and I was doing all possible things to make her happy and to spend some good moments with my friend in stolen moments. On the other hand, I was getting more and more involved into her business , yes her business , to the extent that i forgot it is not ” my business “. Whenever I realized this, emotional attachments drawn me to the fact that this is only thing Universe had offered me , as of now. Soon I accepted the fact.
My world falling apart when one or two more people joined my friend’s business and suddenly she started me pointing for the evils in me at relevant or irrelevant moments. To be honest I ran away many times but something brought me back and I was determined to have few deals with Universe ; loudly or silently
- I was frustrated witnessing abuse of healers and thus wanted my friend to be emotionally strong with the trust that she had capability of saving many lives
- I wanted to learn art of giving
- Shake hands with law of truth ( dangerous but interesting )
I have achieved above all in these 7 years , to my surprise I loved people who had very dark secrets but accepted them head to toe. Honestly, my health impacted because of this all emotional attachments. I lost my finances, health, marriage, family , friends and talent of being Psyche ( which I used to play with since childhood). I kept going and got miraculously help from the Universe.
On the contrary to help and love I have received from my friend, I was insulted in front of team members hundred of time, suddenly i was told that i could never get the valid role in her organization because my heart is dark and all the help which i did in past – is the reason of carrying on with me. I stood up again and again – for her , for the commitment with the Universe. I lost all self love seriously I was so convinced about being a holder of bad karma that in awe of self punishment and I allowed my ex husband to abuse me further.
Me and my friends faced many challenges and we came back together for the business which of course never belonged to me. To serve, it was mine but to get it never belonged to me. A time came when I could feel vibes of her receptionist to anybody in the organization to question my presence. My depression started taking over in all over my life but my commitment to the Universe was my fuel. I have ample of memories when I had to take actions which is not justified from professional perspective – quitting and joining back official whats app group. When I look back – I was unstoppable , I was constantly learning and implementing new things. To add my agony – results in her organization was dropping from my side- I did not realize ; I was all empty within. I remember those words from her organization people – “Say and accept you cannot do it” It was a healing session and it was hard for me to collect myself , I wanted 10 minutes to think and her secretory messaged me and said we seriously do not why Mam tolerates you and we all have to bear you – Say you cannot take the session. Somehow I recollected myself and said I will take it. The session went very very bad and first time in my life I had such an experience and ofcourse my mind got all the validations to leave my healing career. When my friend was becoming successful – the friend inside me was happy but a human being , a hard working unemployed engineer was not sad deep inside.
2015 July – 2018 Dec – seems like the entire universe was committed and conspiring to break me from in and out. Today I have no counting – how many times I was fired from my jobs. Probably Universe was making me strong enough to face the day when I will have to say goodbye to the organization where I have given all my unconditional love , talent, skills and few things cannot be defined. In the company groups – my personal life was not a secret , my emotions was just for fun, ,my personality to be hatred and friendship was no where in the air.
I was a package of extreme jealousy, revenge and much more but life taught me it is even in the great souls – all you have to do is to accept the duality. My friendship became the reason of awakening the molecule of unconditional love which inspired me to not to commit suicide. On the other hand , I could see so clearly the issues in eyes of people around me but I kept going with broken being – one thing I wanted to learn to give. I did it – in 2014 as a business strategist I planned few things for the business model and after all the storms it was executed in Feb 2019 at minor level , it was the day when I knew I have learnt art of giving in true sense. By this time, I lost my confidence and my body was full of toxins. I could not get up and lost almost every desire to move on – it was not a new thing , this downfall was nurtured slowly and to in 2018 I made a new promise before I die – I would give this business so that it can go on in the same way or in the better way even without me. I did that though I never got a penny as appreciation because my all efforts was taken for granted- I was supposed to be.
In this journey of anxiety strokes and so many downfalls, I somehow became friends with truth as well. Now, another challenge was to keep seeing ugly side of healing industry and universe shown it to me in various forms. My friend – oh sorry I lost this relation long back – I lived in an illusion of having a special place in my friend’s life though thankful for awakened unconditional love – which survived me.
Life has its own lessons and I am standing at zero again after losing all what I had invested into. There is a peace inside when I look towards her business – I feel proud in True self. From now onwards, may be there will be no one to guide me, to listen and to talk, to watch movies and to keep making plans but deep inside me – I know its all gone. Today there is revenge into her eyes and her team did not try to give me bullshit without her subconscious consent. There are lot of truths which is similar to my own truth. I know i have ignored you, left your groups, resigned and much more to survive – to stay away from more mental bullshits. May this company grow for many more decades and keep doing the good work for bringing quality of life. I know it hurts but probably this is how I need to deal with life now. I need to collect these broken pieces and reform it into a new structure – a big job.
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